Stress and Emotional Balance

Before we can see how stress affects our emotional balance, we have to understand what stress is.

Simply put, it is anything that interferes with the smooth interrelationship we have with life.

When we are faced with situations we are uncomfortable with and have doubt we can handle, we create stress in our lives.

It is not the situation we are faced with, but our reaction to it that creates the stress.

Emotions must also be understood. E-motion, simply put, is energy in motion. It is the feelings that drive us. Love. Hate. Joy. Sorrow. Reverence. These are all things we feel without conscious thought. It is how we handle them that matters. Emotion has the power to create physiological change and it is extremely important that we master our own emotions to create the changes we choose.

There are many events that we create stress about, and most of them are with us in everyday life. Family relationships can set the stage for tremendous stress. By family, I not only speak of the biological family, but the work family and the world family that we relate to every day.

Other common stressors may include school, jobs, personal relationships and changes in our lives, such as marriage, divorce, and the loss of a loved one. Some of the causes are inherent in everyday life while others, such as acts of terrorism, are seen less often, but are no less a challenge to our health and emotional balance.

The first thing we notice about stress is what it does to our physical bodies. We create many obvious signs that show us when we need to relax and "de-stress." Most often, the first thing we do is hold our breath and tighten our muscles. By doing this, we block the energy in the body and to the brain. This, over time, creates physical ailments and distortions in our thought processes that will need medical/ holistic intervention.

What do you do when you get stressed? Do you find your neck aching and stiff? Do you have headaches? Are you unable to function? There are many ways you will respond to stressful situations and each of you has your own unique ways of doing so.

What about the mind? Stress interferes with the natural use of the mind and its thought processes. What you could ordinarily do in ten minutes may take an hour. You may lose focus on what you're doing and be "somewhere else." You may become depressed or anxious about things you would normally love to do. Your sleep patterns may be altered. You may find yourself in a circle of emotions that keeps going around and around with no apparent way out.

Stress also affects the spiritual perspective. What was once taken for granted now becomes paramount. "Why is this happening?" is a very common question to those under stress. If there is a belief in a higher power, "Why is He/She doing this to me?" will be the question. Everyone wants to either blame something, or connect with that magical power that will save us and fix it for us.

What does this do to our emotional balance? It is very easy in the presence of stress to get caught in a "loop" of emotions that keep us re-acting. We need to recognize when we are caught up in this circle and act consciously to create a more desirable situation.

For this we need to "Defuse" the stress we are creating.

I have compiled a short, simple list of ways to do this.

1. Breathe and relax the body. Lack of air and blocked energy will affect both your physical and mental/emotional being.

2. Pamper your emotional self. This may well be the most important thing you will ever do for yourself!

• Spend time with nature. Walk on a beach, in the forest, by a lake.
• Take a bubble bath.
• Sit in a field and watch the birds. Listen to them; feel their presence.
• Listen to soothing music.
• Have a massage.
• Meditate.
• Spend time with friends.
• Meet with a spiritual advisor.

The list of ways to pamper yourself is endless, so find what it takes for you to relax and nourish your inner self. What makes you joyful and feel less stressed? Experiment. Follow your heart; it will always, always lead you to what you need most at the time.

The emotional battle that stress creates is between the heart and the head. Listen to the heart and avoid the "chatter" you hear from the mind. When you hear the thoughts that tell you that you "should" be doing anything other than what your heart tells you, evaluate the situation and choose to listen to your heart. It may be the most important choice you have ever made.

We need to become aware of our reactions to stress and make new choices that will benefit us in all ways. Without this awareness the cycle of stress and unconscious reaction will continue to rule our lives. With awareness we can make new choices, and act instead of re-act in patterns of old, destructive behavior.

Take the time. Make the time to become familiar with your reaction to uncomfortable situations and become the master of them. You have a choice. You can let them continue to rule you or you can take back your power and live in harmony with life.

By Pat Teevan