Dear Wiseguy

Dear WiseGuy:

I am an ambitious and relatively successful individual who has for the most part done well in life.

But like my friends, my life is full of "ups and downs" with no happy medium every being achieved.

I find this very hard on me and want to find a way to get of this non-stop "emotional roller coaster!" Would you have any helpful insights?

Signed: Rolling but not rocking, Calgary, AB

Dear Rolling,

Essentially, while we are here on Earth, it is important for us to partake of all its gifts so that we may experience and grow from them. However, the challenge occurs when we become "identified" with what we partake in - our homes, our cars, our relationships, and believe them to be indispensable. We forget that "change" is the only constant here, and in this forgetting loose our equilibrium when our relationships or our careers, for instance undergo change. As this is part of the essential learning here, I suggest that you being to practice "healthy detachment."

Healthy detachment advocates that although we are here to partake whole heartedly in all of life's offerings, we must nevertheless remain "detached" enough so that when these things are taken from us, we do not loose our equilibrium and go for dive! With Healthy Detachment, you can enter situations knowing that you can enjoy them "in the moment, for the moment," and not invest yourself in keeping them the same forever. There is a certain freedom here in that you can then begin to "own" your creations, rather you're your creations owning you. I would be more like the dog waging the tail, rather than the other way around which is often how we live our lives.

To begin practicing Healthy Detachment, try putting yourself into "observer" mode. By become an observer in and of your life (and the choices you make in it), will enable you to consciously identify which choices are keeping you on the roller coaster, and which ones will free you form it's constant motion. You may be surprised to see that much of what you may have thought was important and essential, is or has become meaningless and may actually be toxic and harmful. Ultimately, through this awareness, you can proceed to get into the drivers seat in your life and begin making choices which will support you in becoming centered, focused and free from the emotional roller coaster.

By Taron Puri